*Sean and I were listening to this song in the car the other day and it was funny, we couldn't help but look at each other and we tightened the grip around our interlocked fingers. Its so brillant. Many things pass you by. You barely make it sometimes but there are miracles happening everyday, we're just too focused on everything else.
I felt like doing a little update on how everything's been for me.
I'm in the midsts of making preparations to leave in the mid of next month in time for the beginning of my third year. I know I was complaining at how miserable my life was at the beginning of the '11. It was haha, no kidding there. Everything felt like it was spiraling down and to be honest, I felt down most of the time. Everyone was probably having a hard time too cause no one was cutting me any slack in any way and again I was reminded that everyone wasn't who they seemed to be. The beginning of the semester felt like forever cause Curtin Singapore wasn't helping me very much on their end and many things got held back. One including taking a unit I was already exempted from.
The disappointment from a lot of it was piling stress like undone essay homework. I wished I could just hurry deal with it and pray for it to vanish in the next 3 seconds. My parents aren't really around very often so I'm left to handle with practically all of it on my own and sometimes I fee lthe responsibility is too much to bear. Things did simmer down after I moved out of several zones and sat my ass right back to where I was orginally from. School started getting better, life was picking up and well today, I'm happy. With where I am. With Sean, shifting myself around doing my best to try and comprehend what life is all about. I've lost some friends in the process, a potential boyfriend (thank god) and somewhat a good friend.
I'm not upset about either. Reason being is not because I'm oblivious but I believe that everyone has their own set of interests. No two people are the same. I can like your boots and hate your accessories or love you but dump shit on your boyfriend. I've given up on even refering back to superficial 'backstabbing/my life is a social climb therefore it is only imperative that I have more friends than you thus, I must also know who your friends are'. I like who my friends are and friends are not a competition. I don't care if you have more friends or if your friends are pricks. Really. I also believe that being someone friend doesn't even you the right to probe. Please don't be a roommate (with ref to Leighton meester's film). When I was younger, my friends were my prized possessions and I'd do my best so I could always keep them. They still are but you gotta know when you let them go.
With Sean, we've been fine. Fights here and there, the usual. We're trying our bestest like how we used to. I guess sometimes relationships can be so fun because you let yourself be. And no matter what anyone says, I'm happy with Sean. I like the familiarity, the love, the smiles, everything.
There's always a limit to everything and we will cross boundaries in areas at different times of our lives. Nothing's written in stone. They say you write destiny yourself. I think destiny is an amazing thing. Its the pen you use to inscribe your musings, a valuable ally. Use, live, eat and love well and you'll do fine. I'm not sure how old majority of my readers are but I hope you guys take a little something from reading my posts. Its great to see how people have progressed. From lolxzx to lawl and just regularly lol now I believe I've grown up in maybe a hundred ways, a thousand different thoughts and a couple of tangled heartstrings. Its good to be 19 coming 20 and not 14.
You appreciate cut, clarity, carat, color.
Now that's diamond talk.
Have a good week kittens.
Love,
D.
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